Best Burger Recipe Ever. Really.

BurgerOm nom nom. The presentation and photography might suck, but this is the best burger you’ll have this week. Promise.

Read on and follow my super simple, super easy recipe for the best burgers ever.


You will need:

  • A 5lb “tube” of beef. I like ground chuck, personally:

Burger Meat

I know it looks sad, but it’s important that it’s in tube form. This also has the great advantage that it sells for about $3/lb or less, which is pretty decent.

  • Kosher salt
  • Fresh ground black pepper

And uh, that’s it. But wait, there’s more.

Making The Burgers

Get a large knife and sharpen it. Grab the tube ‘o’ beef from the refrigerator, and put it on a cutting board. The brand I bought this time handily has a little weight guide on the side – this will be very handy:

Beef Measurement

Without opening the packaging, start cutting ‘slices’ of beef. Having the knife sharp is important because you need to cut through the tube without squashing it. Use the weight markers to cut 1/4lb burgers (about a half inch thick or so). Use a gentle sawing motion so you aren’t pressing down too hard. When you get half way down, you may need to hold a hand over the top to keep the slice in place as you cut:

Cutting the Beef

When you’ve cut enough burger slices for your needs, remove the plastic rings from the meat:


The slices from each end of the tube will be a bit oddly shaped because of the shape of the packaging, but nobody has ever turned that burger down yet!

Before you cook the burgers, season one side WELL with the salt and fresh ground pepper:

Salt and Pepper

Now cook ’em! I used my aging grill to get a nice flavor to them. Put them seasoned-side down on the grill, then carefully season the other side as they begin to cook. Don’t hold back – much of the flavor simply drips off it anyway.


And that’s it. I know, right? Burgers whose sole ingredients are beef and seasoning? It sounds ridiculous but they are absolutely awesome. Best burgers evaaaah. And so easy to put together; you don’t even have to press the patties.

Trust me, this is so fast, and gives such a good result, you have to try it! Let me know how it goes.

And Now…

And now we return to our usual networking, photography and technology. Thanks for your patience!

2 Comments on Best Burger Recipe Ever. Really.

    • Interesting! Well, of course this assumes that Kroger carefully align their ground mince filaments in one direction rather than just piping slurry forcibly into a tube. 🙂

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